This is an ART announcement:
Aaron Kaplan is the new Prince of Fort Rochambeau Land. He has appointed himself as Duke of Post Control. He plans to do absolutely nothing with this position.
Thank you,
Prince of Fort Rochambeau Land, Duke of Post Control,
Aaron Kaplan
(P.S. This is totally fake)
This post never happened. I never told you the following:
I am agent 007.11111111562585469877785896589665886589586663031123456789987655432115151915815475584562584886498712364555000. I am a secret agent for the A.R.T. The A.R.T. Stands for Joseph’s Real Triumph. My name is Aaron. I am the founder of the A.R.T. There is a total of three agents. Their names are as follows: Aaron, Sam and Joseph.
I work to destroy silly posts. Soon I will use a new destruction technique, but that technique is on a need to know basis.
We use D.I.S. or Destruction of Irritating Silliness as our motto. On our great seal the Latin phrase, “Oohs Disuse” appears in golden letters.
We soon will launch an attack on many posts.
Moo ha ha and Goodbye,
Agent 7(etc…)
Dear Readers,
Apparently in Flannery’s part of the movie, the Space movie, I am dead! This is an outrage!!!!!!!
Dear Readers,
This post is dedicated to my absolute favorite Television show, ‘The Office’ (THE AMERICAN KIND NOT THE BRITISH, LAMER, VERSION!!!!!!!).
The Office recently finished it’s fourth season (which was awesome).
These are the main characters of the Office:
Michael Gary Scott (Just Michael)- The head honcho, if you will, of the office branch. He tries to be funny but honestly is an idiot. Very politically incorrect.
Dwight Kurt Shrute III (Just Dwight)- Assistant to the Regional Manager, then Asistant Regional Manager, and finally just salesman. Hilariously stupid in normal things, and smart in odd things. Constantly being pranged by Jim. At first hates Jim, Then Andy and Jim, then just Andy, then Jim again. Total suck-up to Michael.
James Halpert (Just call him Jim) - Smart, kind, helpful, friendly, funny, impresses everyone he meets. Joker, but can be serious and professional if he wants to be. Disliked by Ryan and Dwight. Constantly pranks Dwight. Is now the Assistant Regional Manager. In love with Pam.
Pamela Beesly (Pam, if you will, but not Pammy)-Smart, sensitive, kind, friendly, artistic, taken advantage often. In love with Jim. Receptionist.
Ryan Bailey Howard- EVIL and in jail. Moo ha ha.
Janet Levinson (Just Jan)- was Michaels boss, then his girlfriend and boss, then his boss again, then his girlfriend and boss, then just his girlfriend, then his ex-girlfriend, now his girlfriend again. Smart, professional.
Holly- Human Resourses Representative.
Phyllis Vance- Saleswoman.
Stanley Hudson- Salesman.
Andrew Bernard- Salesman and regional director in charge of sales.
Dear Readers,
We in Art Starz are making a new movie called ‘Watching TV’. It will be really fun.
Here are some secrets about it (SHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!). It is called watching TV for a reason; the premise is that two or three people are watching TV. What they are watching is actually skits created by ourselves. Each Art Starzian will have his or her own skit. For instance Joe’s will be the battle of Pocky Man V.S. Anti pocky monster. (No kidding). Flannery’s is a wonderful space adventure. Mine will be something to do with the following: The (American) Office, The Classroom, A feild trip, and a stupid teacher. You will force nothing more out of me!
We worked on flannery’s movie yesterday. We took 4 tables and made a ’space ship’. All poof the buttons and ‘equiptment’ were made out of green tape. On this space ship were such sophisticated machinery as a time machine, a tesseract portal, and a vending machine! The good thing was it was all run by Windows XP.
Cordially,
Aaron
Dear Readers,
Noah wrote back! Here is his new move:
“Excellent. I believe it is your move, but here are several from me.
1. Who was the greatest financeer in the bible? Noah, because he floated his stocks while everyone else was in liquidation.
2.who was the greatest female financeer in the bible? pharaoh’s daughter, because she went down to the banks of the Nile and drew out a little prophet.”
Good job, Noah. Here is mine:
1. What dice game is good for boats? Yaght-see.
2 Who is the worst person who hates pocky? Aaron.
Pun: Why did the cow like the intricately twisted thing on which grapes grow? It was a bow-vine.
Pun: What type of key hates thanksgiving? The turKEY.
Why did the geologist go to the concert? He rocked!
2.Why did the dino have a heat pack? His legs were saur.
3.What has e in the front, e in the back and only one letter? An envelope.
4.How does a dog with no nose smell? Horrible.
Dear Readers,
You could say that was an April Fools joke. We really are not ending this fine web log. In fact, we are doing quite the opposite. It is being kept open!
Yay!
Aaron (the devil.)
Dear Readers,
This is Wednesday the Second of April. Remember that date. This may be the last day that I post. Don’t worry. Art Starz is not over, but this blog might end here. You can still see past posts. I might even get to write some more. Don’t get me wrong, life will go on. You’ll survive. But today, I’m here to tell you a little bit of history about this blog.
This is the 148th post written by the Art Starz community. We have about 718 real comments. Akismet spam has caught 696 spam comments.
We’ve had a very succesful blog career.
I will now examine selected posts.
One written by Sam :
“my perspective on The eye of the pyramid (fort)
This is my perspective:
I think that the fort came out really good. The only thing bad thing was that there was basicly no room inside. The outside was magnificent, a giant pyramid with two trianglular windows at the top. It reminds me of something I made at my house, which was a strange shape indeed. It looked like a car covered with a blanket sitting in the middle of the living room. Inside it was pitch black, and really cool. Some of the things you could do were play PS2 and watch movies. The only picture I have of it is in its current state ruin all the blankets are gone and the front chair has tilted forward. (So sad…)”
One by Flannery:
On March 29 everybody turn off your lights and everything els that uses electricity.
It’s earth hour. There are now 138,778 people signed up on earth hour. last year people all over the world turned of there lights and they saved over 14 million gallons of oil! 9,185 businesses have signed up as well.
Join Earth Hour to help save the world!
http://www.earthhour.org”
One by Joe:
HI! Do you like Japanese Stuff? Well I DO!!!!!!! See ya!”
One by Maier:
yes, teenagehood. The most stressful time of life. Between choosing high school, and trying to obtain freedom from seemingly pointless oppression from our parents. Two ultimate forces which clash in a disagreement ranging from everything from boys to the mall to school to weekly spending money. As a lifelong teenage advocate, I feel strongly towards giving teens their rights. These specific rights include rights to life, to go out with boys and go to the mall, liberty, to balance all high school classes henceforth provided that grades stay good and work gets done, and property, at the minimum, our room, the small section of land on planet earth which we, teens, hold dear and make a mess of. Please respect the natural rights of our fellow teens and we will respect yours.”
Now for the awards ceremony, for the best posts.
Longest post:
”
:) Dear Readers,
It is snowing on this lovely day in Providence Rhode Island. At first there was a lot of snow, then it really died down. Now it is thicker than before. This might be the storm of the season! Snow is truly beautiful. Snow has many wonderful uses.
Firstly, snow is beautiful. There is a humongous amount of artwork that reflects the snow’s beauty. Secondly, snow is a symbol. Snow (at least ideal snow) is perfectly white. Not too cold, but not watery. Not too fluffy, but not hard as ice. Perfect. What all men strive to be. And both snow and mankind are perfect. Why? Snow is collective, like mankind. You can’t say “I took a snow from the ground.” Well neither can you say, “I am a mankind.” No, no. However, you can refer to a snowflake or a human being. Each of these is different. Each of these is an individual, and different. No two human beings or snowflakes can ever be the same. If they were the same, they would not function. They would have no soul. They would be pointless. All snowflakes are snow, and all humans are mankind, but each is different. Therefore a friendship is a snowball…
I digress.
Thirdly, snow is a source of water for the word. Fun Fact: Snow is ice. Wow. I am so skillful. The point is, snow is ice, and ice is water, therefore, without snow, there would not be water. Interesting… Fourthly, without snow plants would die. I know this seems like a stretch, but, hear me out. In the winter, it is very cold (WOW I AM A GENIUS : ) ). This cold would surely kill the flowers. However, the snow falls down. You you’d think this would kill the flowers, right, I mean, snow is cold. However, when a blanket of snow falls, it acts as just that; a blanket. Think about it. A blanket (not an electric blanket) or even clothes, really, doesn’t make any heat of it’s own, right. Well why do we feel warmer in clothes? Because they trap the heat we already have. Same principal for the flowers. What would happen if there were no plants? We would die in multiple ways. One: We would have no oxygen, and carbon dioxide would kill us through global warming. Two: The herbivore would die, then the predators, then the carnivores and omnivores. That would be scary. Kudos for snow!
I digress (AGAIN!!!)
Fifthly, snowmen would just be men.
My features:
Pun: Why did the cow like the intricately twisted thing on which grapes grow? It was a bow-vine.
Trivia: What was the name of the fort George Washington made in 1755?
Aaron.
Post Script: Answer- Fort Necescity.”
Shortest post:
This is really fun!!! *** I like posting stuff!
Now for the person who posted the most: ME! Yay! I made 31 posts!
Now for the person who published the least: Maier!
It really doesn’t matter though! We had fun, and that’s all that matters!
Everyone did a super job on this blog!
I have some very exciting news; this is not the end! I will still be able to write. WOO HOO!!!
So, goodbye (for now)
Aaron (Pocky hater.)